Where Is Mercury Morris?

Posted by Adam Hart November 22, 2008 at 9:08 am

Troy Brown uses ESPN’s ColdPizzaFirstTake monstrocity to share his feelings on the differences between the 2007 Patriots (18-1) and the 2008 Titans (10-0 and growing). As the Titans keep on winning, taking aim at a perfect regular season and beyond, just where is the media circus that followed the Patriots in the Year of Our Lord two-thousand and seven?

So Troy cites a smaller fan/media interest in Tennessee’s market as one reason why the hype has not been built to Patriots 2007 levels. Plus, the reduced star power of the Titans helps them fly under the radar. Plain and simple: They do not have Gisele’s boyfriend or Randy Moss racking up points.

Clearly, losing their franchise QB to mental instability and replacing him with A FORMER DRUNK makes the Titans underdogs. And that’s why Mercury Morris wants to kiss them. What, you expected vitriol for another team aiming to “move into his neighborhood”? Wrong. The Titans are “dogs”, just like his ‘72 Dolphins team. Let the sports boner fest begin:

How nice. Apparently, Bill Belichick is less about work ethic and more about fanfare. You’ve seen those press conferences he gives — it’s like having Ocho Cinco or TO at the podium. And Tom Brady. He’s always like, “Oh, let me do tons of commercials because I love the spotlight.”

Yeah, I’m picking on that one comment he made in the video above. But let us not forget Morris’ calm, equally respectful reaction to the Patriots run at perfection, well before BB’s crew reached the (10-0) mark. I mean, “star power” can’t really make a difference in how a former NFL player reacts to a team, can it?

Luckily enough for Morris, the Giants beat the Patriots in that fake-Super Bowl. I envisioned him as a horrible neighbor, walking his dog on New England’s lawn in the early morning hours in order to leave a stinky present. But the Titans? If they run the gamut, he’ll invite them over for BBQ’s and brews. And maybe he’ll even do a nicer post-Super Bowl interview with ESPN’s John Buccigross, who will still probably be wishing that he is interviewing Chris Chelios instead:

To be fair, I’m also a huge fan of the underdog; except when a team I root for is involved on the other end. Such as the Patriots needing the Titans to lose in order to avoid being shown up by a Kerry Collins-led team. But even that will be put aside in Week 12 of the season — the Patriots need Tennessee to beat the J-E-T-S JETS! JETS! JETS! to help in the AFC East race. So I’ll be pulling for the Titans this Sunday. But after that, it’s the Lions (yeah right), Browns (unlikely), Steelers (until Big Ben throws three interceptions) and Colts (do I really have to?) all the way.

Does ESPN want me to do a string of interviews on the topic? I mean, they can’t just keep dipping into the Mercury Morris well forever can they? Oh… they can? Nevermind.

P.S. Maybe Morris is only supportive of the Titans because he doesn’t think they can do it. It’s not like I know. Climbing into that guy’s mind is like walking into a House of Mirrors — you never know what’s true and what’s not.