Quick Hitters: Video Edition

Posted by Adam Hart July 15, 2008 at 12:20 pm

So quick. So very quick…

– If the Revs don’t win the MLS Cup this year, they never will. I mean, they have God on their side. Just think of the vast amount of fans God’s message will reach by His intervening in divine fashion to make the Revs win the Cup. Millions of fans! Thousands of fans! ………Hundreds of fans?

– How is this not your home run derby winner?

It’s the single greatest display of hitting I’ve ever seen in my life. He took that 71-year-old deepstick time after time. But who’s the ESPN.com voice over guy? Did he really think it was a good idea to call the the centerfield portion of Yankee Stadium — littered with police and occupied by no fans — “the black area”? I know ESPN has battled bad drunks, drug smugglers and Boston haters within its ranks, but there is no turning back from a racist comment.

Yeah, I know it only sounds racist if you think of it that way, meaning it’s not racist at all. I just like busting ESPN’s chops, and having an excuse to link to a Chris Berman video.

Before we move on, does Josh Hamilton double as an Iron Chef?

I bet Hamilton is a natural on the grill.

– I want Eddie House back.

It’s as simple as that. His energy off the bench is great, he shoots lights out and he seems like a great guy.

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– A-Rod wasn’t there to talk about Madonna? Well, he definitely wasn’t there to hit home runs as part of Yankee Stadium’s final All-Star festivities, either. He’s got to give us one of the two.

I love how A-Rod slaps Yankees fans in the face during the close out of their fabled stadium by refusing to participate in the Home Run Derby. How does this fly in New York? Yankees fans are so insane about their players, they chant each one’s name in the Top of the 1st until they turn and wave to the bleachers. Yankees fans even want curtain calls for solo home runs in the 1st inning. They expect the world of their players. I just can’t believe they haven’t staged a sit-in at A-Rod’s Kabbalah house of worship to set him straight. Their World Series drought must be taking a huge toll on them. It’s kind of sad.
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– Marisa Miller. Now there’s a girl who’d get the Aunt Jemima treatment from me. What’s that? She’s married? So is Maddona. That didn’t stop A-Rod. Wait, what? Hilgenbrink won’t tell God to make the Revs win the MLS Cup if I do? Dammit. My hands are tied. Sorry, self. We’ll have to make do without the Aunt Jemima treatment (sad face).